How To Blog Whilst Walking The Fine Line Between Sanity & Insanity

moonlight through the trees

The view from karensjointatthetopofthegarden.com

Many of you may wonder why my website address has the name Karen in it. 

Many moons ago I was once known as Karen. After a huge mental health crisis which almost took my life, a new name change came about. 

I was no longer Barren Karen, and I morphed overnight into Blogging Betty. 

Unfortunately before the morph took place, our website had already been established. 

Changing the name of a domain etc is just not worth the hassle, so in loving memory of our dearly departed Karen, the name will stay. 

As most of you are aware I have severe mental illnesses, and spend a lot of time healing my fractured mind, by doing any kind of therapy that I can think of.

baking therapy…one of my many therapies. galaxy chocolate chunk cookies with ice cold milk for dunking.

I am currently sitting in the joint at the top of the garden doing some of my other therapies.

I’ve got one hand on my MacBook and the other one is smoking a reefer. 

It’s dark and cold outside, but it’s so quiet, comfy and peaceful up here. I now have electricity and heat, which is a welcome bonus now that its way below zero, and the middle of December. The only sound I can hear is the odd hoot from a Tawny owl looking for his supper.

taken in my garden last week, the unique ice crystals on fallen leaves

I am sitting here meditating, trying to get out of my own way, so that I can blog tonight. 

I love Blogging. 

Yes I found it late in life, but better late than never, as my old grandad used to say. 

Unfortunately because I found it later in life, and because my mental health issues get in the way, I often find myself wondering if I will ever become a top blogger. 

I’ve been blogging now for around 6 months. In that 6 months I have learned a lot. Not only about blogging, but about myself. 

Being on so many different journeys at once is amazing. 

A journey of self discovery,  a spiritual journey, healing from trauma, self acceptance journey, and my blogging journey all take up most of my time. 

Being an Autistic single parent at the ripe old age of 50, to a 15 year old son who also has Autism with severe Anxiety, and Tourette’s Syndrome, takes up a fair bit of my time too. 

Does this mean I don’t have the time to be a top Blogger ? 

How much time do you need to spend on your blog to be a top Blogger ? 

Since I started blogging I have been following a few top bloggers, but finally found my soul mate in Ryan Biddulph. 

He doesn’t know we’re soul mates, but I do and that’s all that counts. 

Apart from the fact he’s a very handsome chap, he gives out fantastic advice, and if I had more hours in the day I’m sure I would be a top earning blogger just like him by now. 

So as I sit here wondering where I can find the extra hours to follow Ryan Biddulph’s advice, I realise that I am already doing it. Because those of us who walk that fine line between sanity and insanity are juggling so many balls at once, the fact that every time they even publish a blog it’s a huge achievement. 

doesn’t mention that it helps with blogging, but ill try anything… my new daily multivitamin for over 50’s not sure whether to laugh or cry…

Little steps on this journey we call life. 

keep on keeping on… ‘All Bloggers Rock’ love Betty x

Not A Book Nor A Blog, A NABNAB, The Next Chapter.

 

Today I decided to write neither a book nor a blog. 

But what should the title be ? It’s not going to be a book, because I have a personality that won’t allow it. It’s not going to be a blog because Blogging Betty has buggered off somewhere, so what is it ? 

Until a better name for it comes along, a NABNAB is what it is.

A NABNAB

The Next Chapter

Once upon a time long long ago, before you and I even existed,  lived a tiny ball of energy called Betty. 

Betty was a happy little ball of energy, living peacefully side by side with the Trillions of other little balls of energy that existed, before time as we knew it began. 

One day Betty was called upon to choose her path, she was so excited.

Betty knew she was special, just like every other little ball of energy, but she knew she was much stronger than some, so she chose the path of most resistance. 

One day Betty’s and all of the other little balls of energy’s lives changed forever, when a huge bang scattered the energy balls far and wide, to all corners of the globe.

 All of the little energy balls now had a new purpose, in sustaining human life forms.

Energy ball Betty bounced through many many different life forms for millions of years, as energy cannot die, it must always continue on.

Although energy cannot die, it can however become seriously depleted. 

And after millions of years of bouncing, Betty became much less bouncy and her energy was seriously depleted.

Most humans had started believing that it was they who were in charge, and even talk of energy balls were rare. 

Because of what was happening in the world, and because of the human host she had, Betty Awoke one day to find her energy had almost completely gone. She was lost in a dark place and couldn’t find her way out. 

It was then, in the darkest night of the soul, that she was shown the truth. Her truth, who she truly was, and what her final purpose in this life was. 

She remembers being placed into a newborn infant, who’s energy was not strong enough to sustain life, an infant who would face so many life challenges from birth that It would need a special kind of energy to survive the traumas that it would endure in its lifetime. 

All energy has memory, Betty has many millions of memories stored away deep inside.

Once Betty’s host became aware about how important Betty actually was, Betty began running on full power again. Much to the delight of her host. 

Betty is once again a happy little ball of energy., as good as new. All she needed was a bit of TLC, a chance to recharge, daily energy checks and a full MOT.

It suddenly dawned on Betty, that humans were failing to remember how important their energy was, and that the answers to all of their questions lie within themselves.

All energy knows exactly where it should be, positive energy attracts more positive energy, and negative energy attracts more negative energy.

Those energies whose lights were being dimmed by their interaction with negative energies, were failing to remember who they were. They began to yearn for home, even though they were home, a feeling that something wasn’t quite right with the world, then dis-ease crept in.

Betty knew it was her destiny to light up the world, so she decided to use her host as a tool, to share her knowledge, and help to heal a world full of dis-ease.

Unfortunately Betty’s host has severe mental health illnesses, so she doesn’t always get the chance to shine brightly in a world full of darkness.

Now that Betty is back on form, who knows where life will now take her host. 

Urgent !! M.I.A Appeal Launched B.O.L.O.

Breaking news Blogging Betty is missing in action. 

Betty’s Bunch have confirmed that Blogging Betty disappeared around 3 days ago and they haven’t seen her since. 

Betty’s Bunch are the alters with whom she shares a body. They are said to be left devastated by the disappearance of Blogging Betty. 

One of the Bunch, who didn’t wish to be identified, has released a statement saying ‘please come home Betty, were not angry with you, there are 4 unpublished blogs waiting for your return. Since you have been gone, we’ve all been sad. We miss you, life isn’t the same without you.’ 

A spokesperson for the family said ‘Blogging Betty is around 5ft with long blonde hair, with blue eyes.

Will look very similar to the photograph shown, but with a bigger backside a few more wrinkles, and a lot more clothes.

If spotted please contact Betty at the jointatthetopofthegarden.

Your vigilance is much appreciated.

What Google Won’t Tell You About Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Today hasn’t been a good day for me on the personality front.

I have Dissociative Identity Disorder. 

I don’t call it that, being of a different generation and mindset, I prefer to call  it by the old term ‘multiple personality disorder.’ 

There is debate over whether this disorder is distinct separate personalities or merely less than one whole personality. 

I don’t feel less of a whole person, more that I am multiple people.

Less than 2% of the American population have multiple personality disorder, and women are diagnosed 6 times more than men. 

So how come movies always portray men as the crazy person with multiple personality disorder ?, serial killers, who’s alters secretly  kidnap people and murder them ? 

Why is it never the 50 year old British Geordie Bird, who thinks fuck it let’s go rip some heads off ?

I don’t think I have a personality that is capable of murder, but never say never, my ex husband hasn’t been seen for 8 years so you never know. 

Today has not been a good day. Although I can be stable at times, if certain ‘triggers’ occur out of the blue, I can become angry Betty, she is 13 and was let down by everybody in her childhood. She is still very angry about that. 

Last night we were ‘triggered’ during a text conversation with a friend. 

He wasn’t to know it was a trigger for us, but 13 year old Betty got on her high horse and chased him off. 

Waking this morning we still weren’t quite sure which Betty we were, when the teen son suddenly informed us that he wasn’t going to school. He has started refusing school again, and we are thinking about taking him out of the education system altogether, because of his Autism and anxiety.

So in a split second we quickly changed to Mammy Betty.

Mammy Betty gets on with the job, says it like it is, only teenage Betty keeps jumping in and out too. We began switching rapidly through all alters, looking for a solution.

Unfortunately suicidal Betty claimed the throne for a good few hours, whilst stoner Betty and Heidi continually dragged her up to the joint at the top of the garden until she disappeared.

This is quite a disappointed because we thought that suicidal Betty had gone for good. This seems not to be the case. 

We shall have to keep our eye on the ball. This Betty is too clever and sly for us to ignore.

This is me, writer Betty signing out for now. 

Tune in next time for ‘what happened to Wednesday ?’

love Betty x