Breaking News ‘Blogging Betty Found Safe and Well

Blogging Betty has been found safe and well,  in amongst the tangled life of Betty’s bunch.

She seems to be suffering from amnesia, and has no idea of her wherabouts for the entire month that she has been missing.

‘It’s all a blur,’ says blogging Betty, who looks well enough sitting in the joint at the top of the garden. 

“One minute I was blogging away, making friends and building up my blog following, when bam I woke up, and weeks have passed. 

Nothing has been done, karensjointatthetopofthegarden.com remains dormant. I love that the house seems much tidier and festive now,than before I left.

And there’s lots of home made food lying around. 

Everybody looks happy..

I only wish that someone had remembered to press publish on my blogs. It’s not much to ask for” she added.

A spokesperson for Betty’s Bunch said ‘we’re just pleased that Blogging Betty is home. She’s a bit grumpy about the fact we forgot about her blogs, but other than that she seems fine”. 

“It looks like the clean house won’t last now that Blogging Betty is back, she hates cleaning with a passion. She feels that she has much more important things to do in life than clean” said one member of the Bunch, who didn’t wish to be named for fear of repercussion. 

“Blogging Betty’s idea of cleaning is to leave the vacuum plugged in indefinitely, so that if anybody visits she can say ‘oh you’ve just caught me about to vacuum’ (It’s the thought that counts.) Or she’ll hope that the fairies will do it at some point or another. 

Blogging Betty is so passionate about writing, that nothing else gets done around the house, explain Betty’s Bunch.

We help out as much as we can, but  she doesn’t accept help very easily, we’re working on it. 

Blogging Betty is said to be resuming duties with immediate effect, and is now again the leader of the pack. 

we made a welcome home painting …

Blogging Betty would like to thank everybody for their patience whilst she has been missing in action. She thanks the Bunch for holding the fort whilst she was gone, and for baking enough food to feed an army.

She remains optimistic that her memory will return, and her blogging journey will continue on as before. “There’s a lot of work to catch up on, but i’m sure things will only get better”. ‘Don’t ever give up on finding yourself again, it’s always worth it.”

She and the Bunch would like some time to come to terms with the fact that their Triberr is broken. Time to rebuild the foundations that went into creating Triberr from scratch. Betty is sure that the knowledge is in her somewhere, it just may take some time to find it.

It’s Been A Funny Old Day With Corned Beef And Cannabis

Today has been a funny old day.

Isn’t it strange how one small event can set off a chain reaction, and change the whole course of your day. 

Today I decided to bake a pie, I love baking, and recently even started enjoying eating it too. 

So I take the corned beef out of the cupboard and immediately my mind turns to ‘why the hell does corned beef still come in the most dangerous contraption known to mankind?’

We are heading into the year 2020, cars can drive themselves, living on another planet now seems feasible, so why in gods name does corned beef still arrive packaged like this ? 

It is the only tinned food that I have come across that requires risking life and limb, just by opening it. 

If the key is missing, you may as-well throw the damn thing out, rather than trying to use a tin opener. Tin openers do not work with corned beef tins, this is why they provide the key. No key =no corned beef.

Luckily this week my keys were all intact, and I only sliced my finger once on the jagged edges doing so. 

Then I thought ‘I wonder if people even know the dangers of corned beef tins ?’ and should I tell them?

You can’t really blog about corned beef tins can you ? 

This was the moment that my thoughts turned into another blog. 

A recipe blog, so I then began taking pictures of each step of my pie making, on the off chance that somebody might actually want to know how to make a corned beef and potato pie.

So here it is 2 tins of corned beef (check the key and watch your fingers). 

About 6 large potatoes cooked til soft.

Half an onion finely diced and boiled. 

Give it a good mash, pretend it’s the person who invented corned beef tins.

Rough puff pastry, bought or homemade either is good. 

This is when things took another strange turn. I always decorate my pies. I began to think of what decor my pie would have today, when the old nursery rhyme ‘Sing a song of sixpence’ came into my head.

Whilst I’m internally singing along “4 and 20 blackbirds baked in a pie,When the pie was opened the birds began to sing, wasn’t that a dainty dish to put before the king”

Suddenly My brain went Ting and there was my 420 wake and Bake gratitude pie, and my blog became something different again.

I gave up on sharing my recipe,  all you need to do next is stick it in the oven for 35 minutes and the pie cooks itself. 

Upon gathering my thoughts at the end of the day, I find the 5 things that I am most grateful for in my life today. 

My gratitude for being able to live another day on this earth, and the 4 cannabis joints that have helped me to enjoy it. 

Although there is no cannabis in my pie,  there is enough of it in me to save the day. 

A slice of gratitude pie for corned beef, cannabis and happiness..

You can have your pie and eat it. 

Why Anger Isn’t Always A Bad Thing.

 

Most of us have gotten angry at some point in our lives. 

Anger is an normal emotion.

Many people believe that anger is a negative emotion, and try to avoid feeling this way. Most people don’t  particularly like feeling angry. It’s uncomfortable, they would rather feel happy instead. 

But what if you couldn’t feel happy ? What if happiness seemed unattainable ? What if you felt that death was the only way out ?

Anger is the emotion that the fight or flight response can produce, when a real threat to life has been recognised.

Anger then becomes a positive response , activating different neurons in an effort to preserve life. 

Anger has helped me to survive. It has kept me alive in a world that has tried its very best to kill me. 

Am I angry ? Damn right I am. 

I have every reason to be. 

Fighting back.. not dead yet !!

Angry Betty has spoken.

Is your anger keeping you alive ? Or are you keeping it alive ? 

Does it have a positive effect for you ? I’d love to hear your thoughts. 

P.S feeling angry doesn’t make you an angry person. 

Urgent !! M.I.A Appeal Launched B.O.L.O.

Breaking news Blogging Betty is missing in action. 

Betty’s Bunch have confirmed that Blogging Betty disappeared around 3 days ago and they haven’t seen her since. 

Betty’s Bunch are the alters with whom she shares a body. They are said to be left devastated by the disappearance of Blogging Betty. 

One of the Bunch, who didn’t wish to be identified, has released a statement saying ‘please come home Betty, were not angry with you, there are 4 unpublished blogs waiting for your return. Since you have been gone, we’ve all been sad. We miss you, life isn’t the same without you.’ 

A spokesperson for the family said ‘Blogging Betty is around 5ft with long blonde hair, with blue eyes.

Will look very similar to the photograph shown, but with a bigger backside a few more wrinkles, and a lot more clothes.

If spotted please contact Betty at the jointatthetopofthegarden.

Your vigilance is much appreciated.

How Closing Tabs Can Help You Be More Healthy

We’ve all been there, forgetting to close Tabs on your computer until it starts running slowly, or stops working altogether. 

Overload.

There is too much data for our computer to handle.

Our brains work very similar to computers. But are much more superior.

Our Brains have units in networks (Neurons instead of semiconductors. They take in, and compile data. They analyse it and generate output, and so much more. 

Most people don’t even realise that they can have hundreds of open tabs in their brain at any one time. 

These tabs can be thoughts, feelings emotions, memories, basically any data that your brain has encountered is stored away safely.

We often find that when we worry too much, or become too stressed our brain will keep us awake at night searching for a solution to the problem. 

Unfortunately we won’t find the answer in things that happened 20 years ago, or whether our bum looked fat in that dress we wore last week.

not mine or fat…just a bum…

the brain will flick from one thought to another in a desperate attempt to find a solution from all of the stored data that it has, and it has lots of it.

The brain is trying to tell us that something isn’t right, it is glitching and needs a reboot.

Because we are often unaware of what is happening we go to the GP, we take pills, but nothing ever seems to work. 

Since realising that I have had hundreds of thought tabs open most of the time, I have been working on closing them down. Having all of these tabs open has prevented me from seeing clearly, from thinking clearly, it has basically prevented me from living a happy fulfilling life. 

Since closing my tabs down, via medication and meditation I have become so much happier, much more productive, and rarely anxious. This is because I regularly empty the caches from my brain and close unnecessary tabs, just like I do on my MacBook when the need arises.

We all take care of our PC’s in this way, so why not do it for our own super computer ?

Our brains are super computers, they need regular maintenance and servicing, just like any other machine only in a different way.

Have you had your brain serviced lately? 

What are you waiting for ? 

Don’t leave it until it is too late, anxiety leads to depression, depression can lead to suicide. Take control before you lose control.

Close any open tabs, empty your caches, and show your brain some love today.

love Betty x 

What Google Won’t Tell You About Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Today hasn’t been a good day for me on the personality front.

I have Dissociative Identity Disorder. 

I don’t call it that, being of a different generation and mindset, I prefer to call  it by the old term ‘multiple personality disorder.’ 

There is debate over whether this disorder is distinct separate personalities or merely less than one whole personality. 

I don’t feel less of a whole person, more that I am multiple people.

Less than 2% of the American population have multiple personality disorder, and women are diagnosed 6 times more than men. 

So how come movies always portray men as the crazy person with multiple personality disorder ?, serial killers, who’s alters secretly  kidnap people and murder them ? 

Why is it never the 50 year old British Geordie Bird, who thinks fuck it let’s go rip some heads off ?

I don’t think I have a personality that is capable of murder, but never say never, my ex husband hasn’t been seen for 8 years so you never know. 

Today has not been a good day. Although I can be stable at times, if certain ‘triggers’ occur out of the blue, I can become angry Betty, she is 13 and was let down by everybody in her childhood. She is still very angry about that. 

Last night we were ‘triggered’ during a text conversation with a friend. 

He wasn’t to know it was a trigger for us, but 13 year old Betty got on her high horse and chased him off. 

Waking this morning we still weren’t quite sure which Betty we were, when the teen son suddenly informed us that he wasn’t going to school. He has started refusing school again, and we are thinking about taking him out of the education system altogether, because of his Autism and anxiety.

So in a split second we quickly changed to Mammy Betty.

Mammy Betty gets on with the job, says it like it is, only teenage Betty keeps jumping in and out too. We began switching rapidly through all alters, looking for a solution.

Unfortunately suicidal Betty claimed the throne for a good few hours, whilst stoner Betty and Heidi continually dragged her up to the joint at the top of the garden until she disappeared.

This is quite a disappointed because we thought that suicidal Betty had gone for good. This seems not to be the case. 

We shall have to keep our eye on the ball. This Betty is too clever and sly for us to ignore.

This is me, writer Betty signing out for now. 

Tune in next time for ‘what happened to Wednesday ?’

love Betty x